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Are you fed up of having to call firms on Premium rate 0870 numbers,
try this link to find an alternative/cheaper telephone number.
Say No to 0870
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Are you fed up of annoying pop up adverts when you are browsing the web, get a free pop up blocker by clicking the link below, it works and it's free.
Click here for free pop up blocker
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Want to watch Movies or TV free and online you can choose from thousands of
channels, just click on the link below.
Watch free TV online
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If you are a great photographer, you never have a bad picture you won't
need to use this link. If however you are like me and really need some help in making your pictures look good, try this photo
editing software, yes it's FREE.
FREE PHOTO EDITING SOFTWARE.
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Have you got any software that you don't know how to use, many of us have things sitting
on our desktop that we don't use or don't make full use of because they seem too complicated, why not try these video tutorials,
just click on the link below.
Video tutorials
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Do you receive loads of spam email. One way to avoid this is to stop
giving your email address to websites and companies you don't trust, another is to set up a temporary email address, perhaps
an address that will delete after 10 minutes. Below is a link which may be just what you are looking for.
Temporary email address.
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A stranger was seated next to Little Johnny on the plane when the stranger turned to the Little Johnny
and said, "Let's talk. I've heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger."
Little
Johnny, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and said to the stranger, "What would you like to discuss?"
"Oh,
I don't know," said the stranger. "How about nuclear power?"
"OK," said Little Johnny. "That could be an interesting
topic. But let me ask you a question first. "A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat grass. The same stuff. Yet a deer excretes
little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?"
"Jeez,"
said the stranger. "I have no idea."
"Well, then," said Little Johnny, "How is it that you feel qualified to discuss
nuclear power when you don't know shit?"
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Now that they have decided to teach Chinese language in schools I thought these helpful phrases may
help us oldies who are long past school age.
1) That's not right........ Sum Ting wong
2) Are you harbouring a fugitive?....... Hu Ya Hai
Ding
3) See me ASAP....... Kum Hia Nao
4) Stupid Man............ Dum fok
5) Small Horse........... Tai
Ni Po Ni
6) Did you go to the beach?..... Wai Yu So Tan
7) I bumped into a coffee table... Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin
Ni
8) I think you need a facelift...... Chin Too Fat
9 Its very dark in here....... Wai So Dim
10) I
thought you were on a diet..... Wai ya Mun Ching?
11) This is a tow away zone.... No Pah King
12) Re-schedule
our meeting...Wai Yu Kum Nao?
13 Staying out of sight.... Lei Ying Lo
14) He's cleaning his automobile.... Wa
Shing Ka
15) Your body odour is offensive..... Yu Stin Ki Pu
16) Great................. Fa Kin Su Pah
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| In his whites ready to bowl |
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| Is this a young Rick Travers |
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Two bowlers met at the club one day,when
one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?"
The
second bowler replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday, minding my own business, when a beautiful woman
rode up on this Bike, threw it to the ground, took off all her clothes and said,"Take what you want."
The first
bowler nodded approvingly and said,"Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fitted you anyway."
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A bus driver is driving back from the bowls game when he is tapped on his
shoulder by a little old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up. After about 15 minutes,
she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts. When she is about to hand him another batch
again he asks her: "Why don`t you eat the peanuts yourself?""We can't chew them because we've no teeth", she replied.
"We
just love the chocolate around them."
Just for those who don't like smilies.
For those who do like smilies.
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A man walks into a pub with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking,
the monkey starts jumping all over the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced
limes and eats them,then jumps up on the pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole.
The landlord
shouts at the man, "Did you see what your monkey just did?" The man says, "No, what?" "He just ate the cue ball off my
pool table - whole!" says the landlord. "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replies the customer. "He eats everything in sight,
the little twerp. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finishes his drink, pays the bill, and leaves. Two weeks later
he's in the bar again, and he has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again.
While
the man is drinking, the monkey finds a cocktail cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his bum, pulls it out,
and eats it. The landlord is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?" "Now what?" asks the man "Well,
he stuck a cocktail cherry up his bum, then pulled it out and ate it!" says the landlord.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise
me," replies the man. "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he ate that damn cue ball he measures everything
first!"
.
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Subject: : Interesting fact
If you consider that
there has been an average of
160,000 troops in the Iraq theatre of operations
during
the last 22 months, and a total of 2,112 deaths,
that gives a firearm death rate of 60 per 100,000 soldiers.
The
firearm death rate in Washington D.C.
is 80.6
per 100,000 for the same period.
That means that you are about 25% more likely to
be shot and killed
in the U.S. Capitol, which has
the strictest gun control laws in the U.S., than
you are in Iraq.
Conclusion: The U.S.
should pull out of Washington.
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